Relationships are necessary and beautiful facets of human life. We thrive on love; we’re inspired by support; we find progress, productivity, and fulfillment in a network of friends and family. BUT…how much are you relying on others for these very aspects, and how much are you owning for yourself?
Too often, we look to others to provide a sense of fulfillment. Too often, the encouraging glares and supportive words of others are the only beacons pushing us forward. We have the tendency to focus externally for approval and acknowledgment, and forget the internal potential for self-support and self-encouragement. Not only does this hinder our true potential for contentment, but it often shows up as a lack of responsibility for the state of affairs in our lives. So when blame shows up frequently, it may be time to start looking at what you’re not owning up to. When insecurity and the need for others seems powerful enough to transform your mood on a regular basis, it’s a RED FLAG that you are not really supporting and loving yourself in the way that YOU CAN.
Where and how are you too dependent on others? Where in your life are you not taking responsibility? What more do you need or want to own in your life? Somewhere inside, you have the courage and indeed the power to face aspects of life on your own, to take responsibility for the things that you control, and to provide love, encouragement, and supportive care to yourself. In truth, every one of us has the potential to feel fulfilled by our own hearts, to encourage our own minds, and to support our own productivity. Relationships certainly add a wonderful and important dimension of support, but don’t discount your ability to be self-reliant more often than you may be right now.
If you’re having trouble reaching this part of yourself, then go out into the woods or the desert or the mountains, go there alone, and be aware of the elements around you as well as your aloneness… Out there, it’s only you. You have all the power to change your direction, to alter your mood, to rely on yourself. No one will save you out there; there’s no one to fall back on for support or to blame when the going gets tough. If you can get a sense of this power and feel GOOD about it, then bring it back with you into your daily life; feel this self-reliance, sense this self-empowerment as a real and true state of being in the world, even as you engage in relationships. This path will bring to the forefront the things in your life that you may not want to take responsibility for; it may point out insecurities you haven’t been looking at. But only with this awareness, will you be able to find the true Warrior within and without… Only then, will you get the best of both worlds: The Internal and the External!